It's exciting that it is week 15! I pray there will be many more weeks and months! But I hear something in your post, or I imagine I do. It sounded hopeful, but not as hopeful as when the chemo was first helping. You sound thankful not only for each friend who visits or event that you can be part of but also for each moment spent with that friend and each second you are able to soak in any given event. It's kind of like scrapbooking. You are carefully pasting your experiences into your heart. Some you'll share with others and some you will keep to laugh over (or cry over) by yourself. What a collection you must have by now. I've read and heard of SO many people eager to come to your side. Some of the people who come may be challenging, but your scrapbook wouldn't be the same without them:) Others come and provide some comic relief and some are better than medicine with the emotional or spiritual comfort they provide.
2 Corinthians 4:16
Therefore we do not lose heart. Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day.
Did you see that? Did you see what God did right there? He spoke to you. He is telling YOU that the weaker you feel the stronger you are becoming in Him! When I was little and coming to Mount Hermon, when those little houses were where the climbing wall now lives, I remember dressing up one day during the week for a themed BBQ. There was one relay I remember so clearly because the children had so much fun. Each team was supposed to pass a certain number of people over their heads to the front of the line. I remember being lifted and jostled as over the heads of strangers. It was fun and terrifying at the same time. Now, it wasn't one person handing me over to the next but several all at once supporting my head, body and legs. That is what your friends are doing for you! You are finding it hard to walk that narrow path yourself and we are here to support your head and body and legs. Some poke and some are so gentle but all have one hope...an extremely painful hope...and that is for you to pass from our "hands" into the gentle perfect hands of Christ renewed and ready. And do you know what? You are learning to let go and keep your hands open to your savior. It's the same for us. We can only pass you along the line if we keep our hands open as well.
Do not lose heart my friend!
I love you SO much!!!